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Mr. Zheng

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Mr. Zheng last won the day on May 21

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About Mr. Zheng

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  • Birthday 01/01/1970

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    The Land Of Elvis


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  1. Mr. Zheng

    Coming in July

    Hello. First, if you are from the UK and coming in late July, prepare for some heat. It is hotter than hell here and you should be prepared for that. Concerning clothing, I am an overweight man and I would recommend going clothes shopping before coming here, as there is only one chain of stores which sells clothes my size. Chinese men also dress like faggots so you really don't want much of the fashion here. Also, shoes are difficult to find. Again the effeminate men here have little girl feet. I wear a 44 and there is only one store called Decathalon that sells shoes to fit me, bought a pair the other week. Hope to be a help.
  2. The other day I decided I wanted ribs and started for Charcoal. I thought in the back of my mind this would be true and arriving there, my fear was realized, Charcoal is no longer there, replaced by a Sushi place. I wasn’t that surprised of the demise of the place. I think it has sone faults. First, I hated the location, it was just out of the way. Sometimes I would think about going there, but end up more about going to Eudora or another place in the city, near shopping, drinking or places of interest. Charcoal was out in a ghetto of nothingness. Second, they made their own beer. Note, and not to troll here but craft beer tastes like cold piss. Seriously. I hate these pretentious ass places with some copper tank in back with some goofy beer name like Strawberry Pussy Kiss or Carolina Urine. Then they don’t have regular commercial beer because they sell their own crap and that Steampunk machine has to pay for itself someway. Restaurants, please for the Love of Christ, don’t make your own fucking beer. Just buy it wholesale and sell it to us at a ridiculous markup. Sell that copper crap to a hobo. Third, Chinese don’t like our food for the most part, or really anything digestable to anyone but them or a desperate animal. If it isn’t weird, smelly, with an eyeball in it, the Chinese won’t eat it. They have a preconceived supposition if what “western food” is and anything outside that norm doesn’t work. Then they have the audacity to put down American and western food. Well, sorry, we didn’t invent dishes because of famine and starvation. Put down a wonderful Italian pizza versus a bowl of Chou Dofu and ask the Chinese to pick one and the pizza will be gone. Speaking of which, why does Pizza Hut exist? At least Papa Johns got kicked out of here for giving too many people a Number Two the next day. I would like to invite the CEO of Papa Johns to China and then have him get hit by a truck. Because this is what he deserves, not death but three weeks in a Chinese hospital, a fate much more horrible, and be forced to eat his own product. But off the subject of the demise of Charcoal. The name Charcoal itself was bad. Charcoal is the dirty, grimy rocks to cook the meat. Not appetizing. Might as well call the place Dust, Dirt, Coffee Grounds. Flame would have been a nice name, as long as it wasn’t confused with a gay bar. Lastly, the waitstaff. Charcoal is far from the only one, but I hate waitstaff here and their bullshit. You step one foot in and you are shadowed by someone who is pointing me to a seat like I am a toddler, they hand me a menu and run off. They don’t have a conception of someone ordering a drink while looking st the menu and go get my drink now instead of hanging over me like Big Bird. They go get your drink and come back with a glass of tepid water or some other bullshit instead of your drink. Then you want to order and the waitstaff is in some dark vortex of nothingness. Also, bus the damn tables. So tired of looking at dirty ass tables they will slowly clean. If you eat fast food in the restaurant, when you are done, take your trash and the tray and throw your shit away. Can I get an Amen somebody? Lastly (applause) I think Charcoal was one of those places that we say we want to go to, but just never made the effort. As I said before, the place was in the middle of nowhere. We finally made the effort to get way the fuck out there, and got the same reaction I did “It’s closed. Shit.” Life goes on and there will be other mediocre, overpriced bullshit western restaurants in the future and there are many now. Goodbye Charcoal, it was fun sucking your bone.
  3. I would ask the Chinese Embassy in your country of residence. Be prepared perhaps to hear or read two conflicting versions of the law, because this is China, the Kingdom of Mass Confusion (群众混乱的王国). I take it your dog cannot speak Chinese, so he may have trouble communicating with most of the animals here because they don’t speak English, except for the occasional cat licking its balls. Besides dogs are not safe here, they may get kidnapped to be the host of a barbecue. Or much worse, the babydoll plaything of a 19 year old girl with a Prada handbag who does nothing all day except texting her boyfriend and occasionally farting.
  4. I decided under pressure of my newly widowed father that I will lose weight. Been fairly successful. Lost about 50 lbs or over 20 kg in five months. When I was home, I used the services of a diet company to kind of end me on a right path. Although I still drink beer and currently like my Doritos, I am about 90 percent on the path. One thing they told me after my question that I should limit how much white rice I eat. However, the only trait I share with Chinese is my love of rice. I love rice. However, I have mostly limited my rice, except for about a once every ten days wanting of a fried rice dish at my local Lanzhou Lamian place. With my dad when I was home, I showed him some really fattening but wonderful Chinese food. Really from a YouTube video and experience here, a lot of Chinese food is really fattening. One love I always had is three meat baozi washed down with a Bing Hong Cha (having had a Bing Hong Cha for several months when I probably drank several bottles a day.) In the last six months, only had Baozi once. My example to him was Dongpo Rou. I told him I think accurately that Dongpo Rou makes bacon celery in comparison. It is nothing but fat, pork and grease. Wonderful with a bowl of rice. Wow. Second place are deep fried spare ribs. Holy shit. Not seeking it, but if at a banquet with deep fried spare ribs would probably say “Fuck the diet” like Pauly Walnuts and indulge. But I think Dongpo wins the wonderful, delicious fattening food of all time in China. Strange that our bodies like the food the most which is the worst for us. I have not eaten KFC or McDonalds once. I do like the double fish sandwich at McDonalds and have been tempted but not seriously. I will have a Burger King hamburger about twice a month. No fries. No Coca Cola though. Or Bing Hong Cha. But I try and feels good to be down 50 lbs. But Dongpo Rou is the shit.
  5. There is a teaching position available to the right person. It is in Xiasha working for a couple who rented an apartment to start a small school. So far they have five children and probably couldn’t support more than ten kids. The kids ages seem to be from about six and ten. I accepted the job, but saw the distance prohibitive. They seem like a very nice young couple trying to make a buck. My current on and off employer (who is like your lunatic wife you come back to periodically to see if things changed) has offered me about the same work close to home. Actually this job pays better for the time if you live out there. They would pay me 8000 a month for two classes from 9 am to 11:15 am with a 15 minute break, five days a week. If this was in town, it would be a decent gig. If you live in Xiasha, give it a shot. If you speak English and are a foreigner, they will hire you. Please feel free to PM myself or Weixin me at Chinaglenn. Teacher needed by July 5. I don’t want to screw these people over. If you are out in Xiasha (The Garden Spot of the Orient) take the job. Be home by noon, home all day. Glenn
  6. Mr. Zheng

    Standup comedy Scene

    Stand up comedy sucks a dick. I would rather get poked in the eye by a fire poker or fucked in the ass with no grease by Mike Tyson than actually paying money to listen to someone trying to yuck me up. Seriously?
  7. Mr. Zheng

    The World Cup bullshit.

    Well, fortunately it only happens once every four years, but I am sort of dreading the event as a barfly and drunk. Basically all the joints are going to play this crap and this is not so horrible. What does suck is that the bar turns off the music and turns up the volume on the Chinese play by play. I do not understand why people cannot WATCH the game without commentary. If you want commentary, turn your WiFi on and tune into the game online. Simple. Many teams didn’t make it this year. Italy and the Netherlands are two that comes to mind. My country, the USA didn’t make the cut either. Of course, China didn’t make it, despite being the largest nation on Earth. If I were the leader, I would make it a priority for China to be in it. There are probably 50 to a 100,000,000 young men in China between the ages of 18 and 30. Surely out of that pool, you can find twenty boys who can play the game. Doesn’t have to win it and will never win it, but there is a “no face” element to the largest nation on Earth who will do anything to get on the International Stage to fail at this. My favorite team this year, Iceland. One of my best China friends is from Iceland. Iceland had less than 400,000 people. Xiasha District in Hangzhou has more people than Iceland. But yes, to our local barflies and drunks, prepare for your gin joints and off campus dives to be taken over for two months for this bullshit. We’ll live, maybe!
  8. I have been to "Tree College" before and the landscape around the campus is beautiful. If someone enjoys hiking or the outdoors, this might be a good place to be. Slower pace of living, and someone can get a chance to meet some country folks.
  9. Mr. Zheng

    persönliche Reisebegleiterin

    (English) Hello! I'm Deutschlernerin in Hangzhou. C1 I have for German. I'm still studying in Hangzhou before September. If you need an interpreter or a companion during your trip in Hangzhou, you are welcome to ask me. My Wechat [please send me private message for my contact information]
  10. Doctor .."I'm sorry Mr. Zheng, you have the Yunggu. This is why your dick is falling off."
  11. Hello. You guys need to delete old posts please. For example the "Libre Pool Party" which looks fun but was on April 4th (and who has a pool party in early April?). I would be happy to be your editor to delete old, outdated posts.
  12. Mr. Zheng

    decent supermarket

    Fields is ridiculously expensive. They used to be on my Facebook and I used to ridicule them and anyone who bought their crap. Like a "Hamburger Kit" with about a kilogram of beef, some buns and a bottle of ketchup for 200 RMB or some crap. They finally banned by comments, but no one in their right mind should shop there, and have a feeling Fields mostly caters to rich foreign businesspeople who live in their high castles who don't want to mix with the proles. If you read this, look up Fields and have a laugh. Concerning supermarkets. I have lived here a long time and basically I go to different places to get different things. If you want good meat, I can suggest Metro or Ole in the MIXC mall near the river (but on the Subway Green line). There are two Metro stores and unfortunately both are a bit far away from where anyone lives, literally, but they probably have the best selection. Ole' isn't bad but it's expensive, but you can get real hamburger meat, Australian steaks and whatnot. I used to work down that way and sometimes bought a nice steak in there to cook at home. I usually shop at Aushan in DaGuan area. Has a pretty decent meat department and I have bought steaks and hamburger from there lots of times. Even the big Lainhua stores have an OK beef selection. So I haven't for me had much of an issue buying raw meat to cook.
  13. Mr. Zheng

    American Interested in Hangzhou

    Might be stretching it, but ever thought about maybe trying for some kind of scholarship to a University, where part of the deal is for you to teach part time. I would think studying to get a Masters Degree would take a lot of work and time, so I do not see how you could piece together studying and teaching college since both are at the same time, and the Chinese schedule is very inflexible usually. Basically you would teach public school at the same time frame you would be going to classes, Monday to Friday 9 to 5. I could suggest of you have enough money for rent every month (I would say $700 or 4500 RMB a month) you could work part time in one of the numerous after school jobs from children to adults. Problem is there is a lot of weekend work and you won't get any days off between that and your studies. It is also illegal to do so, although many people have done this and continue to do so. Most of the chains have non native speakers on their staff, so they would be happy to get an American. There are lots of opportunities for this. There are chains also teaching adult students, but many of them are also bored and annoyed as the children are, having to learn English because of company requirements. But also a lot of different kinds of people. Adults and kids are about the same to me, there are the good ones, the smart ones, the dumb ones. My suggestion is to choose either course, either be a teacher or a student. See of the college offers some sort of housing or an allowance. I don't know your financial situation, but you can rent a decent place and pay your expenses (besides drinking, eating at the Hyatt everyday, or ladies) would be around $1500 a month, if that, and that would be a comfortable knockabout life here) and you won't have to work and can concentrate on your studies. I spend about 2500 a month in groceries, going to the bar about three times a month (off the drink for know, which hopes saves me money, weight and hangovers.). Might be worth spending an extra $18,000 USD than to deal with kids at training centers. Yes!
  14. Mr. Zheng

    Sauna in Hangzhou?

    I was wondering if anyone knows a sauna in Hangzhou? How much would be the prices for an hour?
  15. Mr. Zheng

    Release paperwork from previous company

    I have been in China for sixteen years, doing this work and know these visas more than the government. Not a brag, just it's my life and one must know the rules. If he is on a business visa, then he is an illegal worker, so there is no need whatsoever to get any "release papers" or whatever from that previous employers, because again, your friend and the company broke the law. I know, in 2009, I worked illegally for a year while being under a marriage visa. When I got a legal job, I had to go through the process to get the work visa, and my employer didn't care about my previous employer. Maybe your new employer doesn't understand his visa status. To be legal, your friend needs to go back to their home country (a must, sorry)and acquire a "Z" visa, which requires an authenticated diploma (in which there is information all over the Internet), and a criminal background report, which must be approved by the appropriate officials of the Chinese embassy in his own country. It sucks now for new applicants, but it is what it is. Can your friend extend the business visa? Sure, if there is a reason for the person to get one. BUT again, one cannot legally work with payment from China on a business visa. Business visas are for stuff like an import/export person with a company who needs to stay in China more than 30 days to do stuff, or a Representitive of a foreign company coming over to inspect a factory or something similar. Working on anything except a work visa brings severe penalties if caught, including jail time, a possible felony, upwards to 20,000 RMB in fines and deportation for at least five years. NOW, chances are you wont get caught, but is it worth it if your friend can get a real work visa which after the initial bullshit is relatively easy to renew for successive years? Not to mention for the foreigner having legal protection under the law. Illegal workers don't have that. If his boss decides not to pay, what can your friend do, go to the police and admit to an illegal act? Sort of like going to the cops to make a complaint that Bob stole your cocaine. You get it now. Be legal. Business Visas are shit. Good Luck.