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Mr. Zheng

How would one report a website to be blocked?

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We are having a crisis in my home. My (Chinese) wife is a gambling addict. Not a joke and not to be funny. I have been married to her almost 17 years and she has always gambled, but her gambling was of the majiang variety with her girlfriends back in the early years of our relationship. But she has also been to Macau numerous times. She even went to Zambia in Africa and I followed her all the way there and she was gambling again in the local casino.

Now she is addicted to a website where she plays live Baccarat online. She is like a crackhead on this shit (again, not an exaggeration). She will play up to 16 hours a day on it. The other night, I get up at 3 am to use the bathroom and she is in there still and has been in there for at least eight hours.

I have tried to talk to her and consul her on this. She doesn’t listen to me. She will even claim she isn’t gambling while she is gambling. Today her stepson Weixin messaged me if she was home. Her stepson and myself are supporting her basically since she doesn’t work now nor will she look for a job! She is a “businesswoman”. She did well back in the 00’s but hasn’t done anything for several years and I really don’t know how she gets money. 

I am making her sound bad and she isn’t. She is addicted to this shit. I don’t want to divorce her, again been married to her a long time. I have had my problems with drink and crazy behavior and she was the responsible one who told me to cut it out or else (still drink but my “cowboy behavior” is much less than before).

Ok. I want to report to the police, the “internet police” about this website and see if they can block it. I mean, China blocks so many websites and gambling is illegal. Gambling online is illegal in the USA much less China. If these websites were done away with, a lot of the problem would go away, perhaps. Even if it doesn’t, it is still illegal.

So which police agency would I contact about this? We are sort of at the end of our rope. Maybe some of you have seen a show called “Intervention” where a freak does dope or drinks a gallon of Vodka a day and gets talked into treatment. Or something. 

I want to move back to America next year and want her with me. But not gambling for fuck sake.

Probably not an answer, but alerting the authorities about this would be a start. You would think with such a strict internet monitoring force this shit would be gone already or someone is a bagman for this.

Big Brother, need your Authoritarian hand. People ask me what it is like living in China. Well, it’s like living in your parents house and you follow their rules and Xi Jinping is Dad. And my wife needs to be beaten with a belt.

Peace and Help from the Province.

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Dear Space Pasta,

If she does come back with me, she will be put on a tight budget and I will be the one who will pay for her needs. This is a concern because casinos are everywhere in America. There is a casino town (where I used to work twenty years ago) about 50km/30 miles away. But you don’t need the casinos when you have the internet.

However these websites are illegal in the USA and are immediately shut down. I have no interest in casino gambling simply because I know the odds and know it’s bullshit. For me it might be fun to go there with $200-300 bucks, play the 21 tables and shoot dice. But if you lose it, I did get to drink high shelf liquor and get a buffet out of the deal. Table games gambling to me is a challenge, but a difficult one, and then again, if I wanted to throw away $200, I could go party in a bar, have a huge steak, or whatnot. $200 really isn’t beans in a casino anyway, years ago, I lost a $100 in about ten minutes on he dice table and I was sober. Better to just use that money on booze, dope and hookers, at least I get something in return.

Time will tell and no, I am not giving her any more money without knowing where it is going. I also am very much in love with her. I told her earlier I was heading back to Hangzhou (moving  to Dongyang to teach) but what I wanted to do cannot be done until early next week. My wife asked me if I was leaving tomorrow and I said no, and she told me she wanted me to stay so this means a lot since I have nagged and conjoled her. 

We could be a show on Dr. Phil.

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Honestly, blocking a website is a band-aid. The truth is you just have to cut her off. Gambling addictions are super common here in China. You must cut her off financially or it isn't going to stop. Her family (Chinese side) would do the exact same thing. I've seen it done with my wife's cousin. They still treat and respect him but if he ask for money, it's a no. 

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Easy... go to talk to her parents... problem solved...

If not? Give her a substitute addiction...

I traded my gambling for gaming and smoking... ezzzz

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Well her father is dead and her mother is 90 years old so I don’t think this is viable. Her son, my stepson has almost written her off. She’s gambling now, after the other day her daughter in law almost in tears came over telling her she needs to stop this, because basically they and to a lesser degree myself has been paying for her upkeep for the past several years.

This is just like a drug addiction. I for myself am tired of China after all these years and want to finally go back to America and live. My dad even wants me to divorce her and he doesn’t know about this gambling crap. My mother who passed away in January went through a gambling spell because there were troubles in our house in the 1990’s and my father had to step in and take charge of the finances for awhile, but with mom it’s like someone who want alcoholic but drank a lot and it caught up. My wife is a crackhead now with this shit. I guess what goes around comes around.

I am going to come back to Hangzhou and wage a complaint. Dunno if it will do any good, but if YouTube, FB and all that bullshit is blocked, this should be also and don’t understand why it isn’t. My wife is too dumb to know about the Victoria Principal Network but would probably learn if she lost track.

Except for this, don’t know except for a divorce which will break my heart. But I am tired of dirty ass China and would be happy in a small house, a dog, a pickup truck, Taco Bell and a hot tub.

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Put her on a budget, each month x money she can spend....
Otherwise, these kind people is not curable...
Its a common "disease" among many Chinese who live in luxury...

Blocked the website is pointless... Its not solving the root...

Edited by Chappie

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4 hours ago, Mr. Zheng said:

Dunno if it will do any good, but if YouTube, FB and all that bullshit is blocked, this should be also and don’t understand why it isn’t

This alone screams desperate. There is such a thing as tough love. If you are her main income, then you just cut it off completely. You buy grocceries, you pay the bills, not give her the money to pay or buy them. She'll still be able to eat, live, but not gamble.

You want to move back to the US. Are you planning on taking her with you, cause then all those wonderful blocked websites will be blocked no more. 

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3 hours ago, Mr. Zheng said:

However these websites are illegal in the USA and are immediately shut down. I have no interest in casino gambling simply because I know the odds and know it’s bullshit. For me it might be fun to go there with $200-300 bucks, play the 21 tables and shoot dice. But if you lose it, I did get to drink high shelf liquor and get a buffet out of the deal. 

I'm the same way. I walk in with a couple hundred bucks knowing that it'll be gone by the end of the day. Only have done it twice in my life and don't like gambling at casinos. However, she is a gambling addict.

Anyway, hope it works out for you. If you are in love with her, I can understand why its hard to say no. 

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